June Update

It’s been a busy time, and I often want to wait until I have all the answers before sharing an update. But that would delay things too much, so let’s break it down into sections.

Video Update!
Apologies for the wind noise and for falling out of frame, but here’s a video update:

Appointment Update!

I secured my infusion appointment for July 1st, so that’s resolved! Thank you!

Radiation

In late April/beginning of May, I underwent five consecutive days of radiation treatment. The treatment itself was relatively easy, sessions were short, and I didn’t experience any significant problems. The real challenge began in the weeks that followed.

Our original plan was for me to take a short break from chemo to recover, then do radiation, followed by another week or so of recovery before returning to chemo. Instead, the radiation treatment was scheduled with only a few days gap on either side of my chemo.

For about two weeks after radiation, while receiving chemo, I experienced mild to moderate abdominal pains and had trouble processing food. We suspected it was likely inflammation from the radiation, so I switched to a soft food diet.

I’ve since recovered decently, but still have some abdominal pains. I’m trying to determine if it’s due to tumor growth or residual inflammation from the radiation. Additionally, radiation can obscure CA 19-9 results, making them unreliable for a few weeks. That said, my results have been trending down in the good direction for the last month.

New Chemo

I started a new course of chemo in March, which has similarities to the original course I received in Fall 2023. I guess I forgot some of the side effects, or perhaps they are lasting longer, or it could be a cumulative effect from all these months of chemo.

I experience mild nausea, neuropathy, and other issues, but they are all manageable and rarely debilitating.

Good CT Scan

The results from my CT scan were available within hours and showed the tumor was about 10% smaller in June compared to March. The March scan had indicated a 27% growth since December, which is why we pursued the combined radiation and chemotherapy. I’m grateful that the growth has been arrested and the tumor has shrunk a bit—that’s good news!

I understand that while these are victories, the reality is that this is an aggressive systemic cancer. My main goal is for the various therapies to keep it at bay and possibly shrink it, but the situation could change at any time.

Sometimes it’s not always rosy  

The few days I’m receiving chemo can sometimes be difficult. I’m reminded that I’m continuously receiving chemotherapy over a three-day span. During this time, it can be very tiring, uncomfortable, and fatiguing, sometimes to the point where I agree with the “newbies” that I just want off the chemo.

But then I get off my chemo pump.

What was a difficult time begins to feel better, and I can see blue skies and hear chirping birds again. I just have to get through those few days. I have to hold onto the hope that it will get better in just a little time.

Long Road

Sometimes it’s hard when people ask how many more rounds of chemo I have, and I explain that I’ll likely be on chemo for the rest of my life. I understand that different cancers have different treatments, and for pancreatic cancer, there aren’t many options currently. But yes, I’m grateful to be receiving treatment—treatment that is currently effective against my tumors. So, thank God for that.

Prayer Requests

1. This chemo is working for now, so let’s keep this going as long as possible.
2. My side effects, while manageable, can be hard sometimes. I appreciate the many prayers that have sustained me.
3. My current insurance provider, Blueshield, is in contract negotiations with UCLA, where my wonderful medical team and treatments are at. It appears the contract will be broken on July 7. This may mean I will no longer be able to receive care at UCLA. I am applying for “Continuity of Care” to possibly still receive care at UCLA. Please keep me, as well as other patients, in your prayers that the contract between Blue Shield and UCLA will be successfully renewed. 

Manna Healing

Ever since I was diagnosed, people (and I) have prayed for healing. Yet, here I am, still with cancer—sometimes growing, sometimes stable, sometimes shrinking, but still present.

So, have the prayers been in vain? Am I not healed?

I’ve been viewing this less in black and white now. I am not totally healed and cancer-free. In fact, with this cancer and stage, I will likely never be cancer-free.

But I’ve still been here for almost two years.

In the Bible, when the Israelites were wandering in the desert after the parting of the Red Sea, they began to run out of food. God provided Manna (bread) from heaven, but it was only meant to last for one day; the next day, they would gather bread again for that day’s sustenance.

I’m starting to think of my healing as a form of “manna,” where I have enough healing for today, and I’ll deal with tomorrow when tomorrow comes. As much as I would prefer instant and total healing, prayers have kept me alive for all this time so far, and I’ll take it.

It’s enough for today.

P